PDA

View Full Version : How to get a Test Wicket Thread (ideas)


Jadukor
November 14, 2012, 03:06 AM
Having waited since the morning to see a fall of a WI wicket, over the course of the day, I realized the tremendously difficult task it is for our bowlers to get a test wicket and hence I would like to dedicate this thread for our bowlers so that we can channel some fresh ideas that would lead them towards wicket taking success

1. Synchronized grunting method: It is obvious that Shahadat's chief weapon has always been his grunt to unsettle the batsman and now that everyone is used to it, the fielders must assist him in enhancing the grunt attack. As he runs up to bowl, all the fielders could grunt in unison with him in order to amplify the effect and truly unsettle the batsman during every delivery thereby resulting his downfall

2. Hire Afridi to do on field commentary: As we all know afridi likes playing jumping jacks on the middle of the pitch during innings break so perhaps he could assist us in that regard during on field commentary and pitch report so that we get more purchase from the wicket

3. Covert Stumping: we could look for stumping/run out opportunities during century celebration or over breaks

4. Silly point suffocation: we could surround the new batsman with 8 silly point fielders in the hope that one or two might be claustrophobic

5. Global Warming: perhaps it's time for more carbon emissions and make the climate even warmer and unbearable for batters so that they give away their wicket in the extreme heat

further ideas are welcome

Sohel
November 14, 2012, 03:11 AM
Scout (using foreign scouts) and naturalize like there is no tomorrow.

Maysun
November 14, 2012, 03:16 AM
Waiting for Pont to come and say "Pont" :lol:

Ok seriously? The 5 star hotels should serve the visiting team street food in a disguise. Then the opposition batsmen would totally crap their pants while facing our bowlers! :D

Zunaid
November 14, 2012, 03:17 AM
Sneak in to the field. Grab the wickets and run before they catch you.

revolver
November 14, 2012, 03:18 AM
:lol: :lol:
<br />Posted via BC Mobile Edition (Blackberry)

betaar
November 14, 2012, 03:22 AM
Sneak in to the field. Grab the wickets and run before they catch you.

Clothing is optional.

WarWolf
November 14, 2012, 03:26 AM
Sneak in to the field. Grab the wickets and run before they catch you.
Top post BOSS!! You made my day!!!:D

Night_wolf
November 14, 2012, 06:16 AM
Sneak in to the field. Grab the wickets and run before they catch you.

Clothing is optional.


LooooooLLLLLLLLLLL:floor::floor::floor:

Rubu
November 14, 2012, 08:17 AM
Easy, just ask any bowler playing against Bangladesh.

Or, did you mean to ask how to get a test wicket for Bangladesh? ;)

NoName
November 14, 2012, 09:53 AM
LOL unison grunting

kumar89
November 14, 2012, 10:19 AM
Change the Bowling Uniform: all bowlers should wear Lungi, should do the trick:)

Ahsan
November 14, 2012, 11:44 AM
5. Global Warming: perhaps it's time for more carbon emissions and make the climate even warmer and unbearable for batters so that they give away their wicket in the extreme heat

further ideas are welcome

6. in-field "ye" bombardment: perhaps it is time for more "ye" emissions and make the air around batsmen so stinky that they would not wanna stay in crease for long time! Ingredients needed - boiled egg, cucumber and dholai khal'er chanachur.

simon
November 14, 2012, 11:57 AM
I think we need to create distractions which will break their concentration.
Like for WI play the "Gangnam" song.
For Pak play any Bolly item song
For Ind bring some white chicks who will perform in some item songs aswell.
For SA scare them with some voodoo dolls
For Srilanka , complete silence in the stadium.
etc.
etc

Nadim
November 14, 2012, 12:02 PM
We need this man Ananto Jalil pom Gana. Heard he worked with amader ex bowling coach while he was in the Gana U19 team.

https://fbcdn-sphotos-d-a.akamaihd.net/hphotos-ak-prn1/12708_130102707140949_429559748_n.jpg

AsifTheManRahman
November 14, 2012, 12:40 PM
Not surprisingly, the truth is down here:

<iframe src="http://www.youtube.com/embed/AJp8jpDIycI" allowfullscreen="" frameborder="0" height="315" width="420"></iframe>

The gulgula ball is the answer.

RB_Cricket
November 14, 2012, 04:27 PM
Lets " Shamim" have a 5 minutes conversation with opposite team player right before the game starts.. :)

Finally, Bangla cinema treatment.. Bring our Super hero and let them bowl.. "S** Khan" and "U from Gana" will definately do the job..If not, their voice during each delivery.."yaaa dishuaaa" enough to confuse the hell out of the batsman concentration.

ialbd
November 14, 2012, 04:56 PM
hilarious thread... keep em coming brothers...

@Asif bhai, didnt they change the rule around the double bounce deliveries some time back? that is its a no/dead ball under the amended law...

One World
November 14, 2012, 05:07 PM
Thanks for the dead night laughter. Seriously hold on to catches.

Catches win matches - ingrain in their head by some Quantum Method type process.

BANFAN
November 14, 2012, 06:05 PM
There should be a specialist farter in the team to get maximum wicket in test matches :)

his job will be to field in close off/on depending on the direction of wind. He can Sync with SRK grant and should have special menu...like Mula etc to make it strong enough to force the batsman to hold his breath...we can encourage all bowlers to grant for a better effect... If they cannot ball line and length, they should at least grant...

There is no other legal way to get wickets in test cricket .....:) This is just a form of sledging...

BANFAN
November 14, 2012, 06:08 PM
Thanks for the dead night laughter. Seriously hold on to catches.

Catches win matches - ingrain in their head by some Quantum Method type process.

And also on a serious note: Hold on to coaches...

Jumon
November 16, 2012, 09:51 AM
Waiting for Pont to come and say "Pont" :lol:

Ok seriously? The 5 star hotels should serve the visiting team street food in a disguise. Then the opposition batsmen would totally crap their pants while facing our bowlers! :D

Whattttt an Idea Sir Jiii:P
<br />Posted via BC Mobile Edition (Opera Mobile)

kalpurush
November 16, 2012, 10:43 AM
Thanks for the dead night laughter. Seriously hold on to catches.

Catches win matches - ingrain in their head by some Quantum Method type process.
One World - very happy to see you mate. Missed you a lot man.

kalpurush
November 16, 2012, 10:43 AM
How to get a Test wicket?











Ask Zunaid!

zman
November 16, 2012, 11:07 AM
All the above are great measures....if they don't work then go back to the basics and try fear tactics...inspiring tremendous fear in the heart of the bowlers just might do the trick....first try "beter bari" and then keep a placard behind the wickets that says--

"Ei session e wicket na paile Sohel bhai er rant er kholnayok hobi tui...Shei rant shadh shokale khoborer kagoje chobi shoho chapano hobe"

Shubho
November 16, 2012, 11:21 AM
How about asking the opposition batsmen nicely?

"Hey mister! Would you be so kind as to not attempt a stroke next ball? I would really like to get your wicket. It would be such an extraordinary honor. Besides, my entire existence, that of my family, indeed my nation, depends on it. Have mercy on us. Take pity. I am appealing to you most humbly, kind sir, to gift your wicket to me. It would be a most magnanimous gesture. I, my family, my teammates, the fans, indeed the whole nation, would be ever so grateful. We won't ever forget your sacrifice. We will sing songs about you for millennia. We will give you honorary citizenship. We will name streets, airports, hotels, lakes, hills, districts and divisions after you. Please, kind sir. Grant us this wish."

Which batsman could deny us this favour if asked nicely.

Job done.

BANFAN
November 16, 2012, 11:25 AM
Why don't you directly say that in one word... Begging :)

Shubho
November 16, 2012, 11:30 AM
Why don't you directly say that in one word... Begging :)

Perhaps I should have. :)

So many bhikkuks in our country. We should be experts at successfully begging for wickets.

One World
November 16, 2012, 01:02 PM
Well, albeit Naeem our batters have shown how to miss an inevitable test century. Even after fourth day still dropping lollies measure expensive.

sharup
November 16, 2012, 03:21 PM
At the precise moment of release of the ball, every BD player in the line of batsman's vision should flash the batsman( by lifting their top that is). If that doesn't work mooning it is (all at once). Witnessing such horrific sights the batsman is bound to scream and run towards the pavilion. This synchronized effort might mentally scar the batsman for life.

Zeeshan
November 16, 2012, 04:05 PM
How about asking the opposition batsmen nicely?

"Hey mister! Would you be so kind as to not attempt a stroke next ball? I would really like to get your wicket. It would be such an extraordinary honor. Besides, my entire existence, that of my family, indeed my nation, depends on it. Have mercy on us. Take pity. I am appealing to you most humbly, kind sir, to gift your wicket to me. It would be a most magnanimous gesture. I, my family, my teammates, the fans, indeed the whole nation, would be ever so grateful. We won't ever forget your sacrifice. We will sing songs about you for millennia. We will give you honorary citizenship. We will name streets, airports, hotels, lakes, hills, districts and divisions after you. Please, kind sir. Grant us this wish."

Which batsman could deny us this favour if asked nicely.

Job done.

Brilliant!

KaaL-PurusH
November 22, 2012, 10:24 AM
Too easy. Dont listen to mushy and apply his plan upside down. Loll

Tigers_eye
November 22, 2012, 10:33 AM
Too easy. Infiltrate other teams with Bangalis and wait and watch. Not only wickets will come to your feet, it will come in abundance.

Flat track, Highway to shodorghat, bouncy pitch, doesn't matter.

Naimul_Hd
November 22, 2012, 10:34 AM
Get the batsmen drunk during drinks break. Mix the water with alcohol and batsmen will make your task easy :)

Maysun
November 22, 2012, 10:51 AM
Give them some Bangladeshi Rum. They'll keep puking ;)

Isnaad
November 22, 2012, 02:12 PM
Ananto Jalil chhara upay nai.
<br />Posted via BC Mobile Edition (Opera Mobile)

Isnaad
November 22, 2012, 02:14 PM
<br />Posted via BC Mobile Edition (Opera Mobile)

Jadukor
November 22, 2012, 06:40 PM
We need to set up an Akram khan interview on the pitch. His weight is bound to crack the surface further and help our spinners.

AsifTheManRahman
November 22, 2012, 11:31 PM
The begging technique doesn't work on Sehwag:


By Sehwag
"Yeh bowling kar raha hai ya bheekh maang raha hai? [Is he bowling or begging?]"
To Pakistan close-in fielders after Shoaib Akhtar's continuous sledging, asking Sehwag to hook. Even Shoaib's team-mates couldn't keep from laughing. Multan, 2003-04 (http://www.espncricinfo.com/ci/engine/match/64081.html)

http://www.espncricinfo.com/india/content/current/story/592425.html
(http://www.espncricinfo.com/ci/engine/match/64081.html)

Roey Haque
November 22, 2012, 11:38 PM
Hold every training camp in high altitude. Fly the team to Nepal maybe. That way it builds up our bowlers' endurance and allows them to come hard at the batsmen during the whole day sans any hint of lethargy.

Jadukor
November 23, 2012, 01:32 AM
Removing Mushy from captaincy might help too so that at least the slip fielder placement can be done right for once

technocrews
November 23, 2012, 03:12 AM
We need this man Ananto Jalil pom Gana. Heard he worked with amader ex bowling coach while he was in the Gana U19 team.

https://fbcdn-sphotos-d-a.akamaihd.net/hphotos-ak-prn1/12708_130102707140949_429559748_n.jpg

ভাই এইখানে জলিল ভাইরে টানার কি দরকার , সে একটু বোকা বলে সবাই তারে নিয়া যা স্টার্ট করল এখন দেখলে রা ভাল লাগে না ...:facepalm:

SS
November 23, 2012, 03:14 AM
ভাই এইখানে জলিল ভাইরে টানার কি দরকার , সে একটু বোকা বলে সবাই তারে নিয়া যা স্টার্ট করল এখন দেখলে রা ভাল লাগে না ...:facepalm:

ki ato boro aspordha he is better than anybody else

technocrews
November 23, 2012, 03:15 AM
বাংলাদেশ দল এখন ওয়েস্টইন্দিস এর খেলোয়াড় দের গায়ে বল ছুরে ইঞ্জুর করে দিলে তারা ব্যাটিং করা অফ করবে নইলে ওদের কোন মতে আউট করা যাবে না ।

BANFAN
November 23, 2012, 03:26 AM
Going with a bowler short, Beg for wickets now....

Habib
November 23, 2012, 03:54 AM
Going with a bowler short, Beg for wickets now....

Even one of our bowlers has turned into a batsman...LOL. We are doomed. Let's play with 11 batsmen in the future.

Jadukor
November 23, 2012, 04:09 AM
We could sue WI for a harassment case against our bowlers. Maybe the threat of legal action will prompt them to gift their wickets

Zeeshan
November 23, 2012, 04:19 AM
Not play...simple.

Zunaid
November 23, 2012, 04:36 AM
By one on ebay - there are some great Black Friday deals. Not like the other Black Friday happening at Khulna.

zman
November 23, 2012, 09:52 AM
Have frequent strikes/hartals in Khulna and poison Gayle's mind with ideas of insurgency. If we can instigate him enough to start another rebellion, then maybe WI will be forced to send a 3rd string team like they did in 09 --
DM Richards, OJ Phillips, TM Dowlin, RO Hinds, FL Reifer, DE Bernard, DJG Sammy, CAK Walton, RA Austin, TL Best, KAJ Roach
Our bowlers already proved they're capable of taking these wickets...Now how our batsmen will fare against their bowlers, that's a different topic

technocrews
November 25, 2012, 10:19 AM
ki ato boro aspordha he is better than anybody else

:ohno:After all she akhon Bangladesh number 1 hero , ar mediar shobchaite jonopriow manush . :notworthy: ,

MyRoom
November 25, 2012, 10:39 AM
Easy! prepare turning tracks spin is our main strength but for some reason, 'Tigers' were scared of Narine but even with flat pitches still lose hehe

NoName
November 25, 2012, 03:53 PM
I'd rather Narine rip us apart than some bowler that even WI fans think sucks, Tino Best.

Jadukor
March 9, 2013, 02:47 AM
Putting Super glue on Jahirul and Abul's hands might work

Jadukor
January 28, 2014, 02:37 AM
Could we mislead them into thinking it's a T-20 via Jalal Younus?

Night_wolf
January 28, 2014, 02:43 AM
Could we mislead them into thinking it's a T-20 via Jalal Younus?

whats the point..aivabe khelle 600 korbe 3rd day te..amader akta chance ase match 5th day te nebar..t20 vebe khelle 600 ajkei kore felbe

aklemalp
January 30, 2014, 04:26 PM
Good line and length, minor errors in the batsmen,sledging is optional, but if you're an Australian it is mandatory.

One World
February 4, 2014, 05:48 AM
After watching how end of the day Sanga Wicket was clearly denied by the umpire, I am speechless and cannot think any other ways left.