View Full Version : Banglacricket Roast 2017

June 5, 2017, 11:45 PM
Banglacricket Roast 2017

Thank you. Thank you everyone. Thank you Nasif bhai for inviting me. It is truly an honor. Welcome to Banglacricket Roast of 2017. Every year we do it. Thanks for inviting me back even though last year (https://www.banglacricket.com/alochona/showthread.php?t=46979) it was convoluted, choppy and forced at times.

We are pleased to see some fresh new faces and even recent resurgence of old heads like goru. But enough about eclipse. That's more airtime for him than Taskin's featurette in Champion's Trophy.

We also have members like Roy1 and Roey. Yes it can be confusing like the famous French impressionists Manet and Monet. Both are artists. Both have came up with masterpieces. For instance, Roey Haque's Full of Myself which has ranked 12 on iTunes (closely followed by his beatboxing LP) has more views than the fair and balanced ones of Mushfiqur's wicket keeping analysis.

<iframe width="560" height="315" src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/o2bpA_5F_AM" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen></iframe>

We also have a stoic poster named MHRAM. He draws inspiration from Diogenes who told Alexander to GTFO from his pipe when he blocked the sunlight. The same sunlight that MHRAM needs to keep dying embers of pessimism burning in corners of his chest. He comes from school of Marcus Aurelius, Seneca and Schopenhauer whose first task in the morning is to eat a frog so that it can't get any worse later on in the day.

That's right. Eat a frog. Either that or hear Roey Haque's beatboxing croaking audios on soundcloud.

We also have Tanvir_Nus. Tanvir is famous for penning the most articles in BC without ever making it to front page.

Aklemalp still alive and kicking. Unlike his team West Indies of course.

We have our pious figure Rifat. Rifat hardly loses his cool, known for his benign disposition and Saint Simeon like patience.

To which the rain-abandoned Bangladesh vs Australia match said... yes [laughs] it is an actual entity - Google it - said "HOLD MY BEER"....

mufi tui roja raikha eishob ki kosh...chi chi chi

And we couldn't even post the original message.

Before we proceed any further. We also have yours truly. Yes, Zeeshan. Or known in Mozambique as "The One Who Refers Himself In Third Person And "The One Who Refers Himself in "The One Who Refers Himself In...."

Yes he is so into himself even WV Quine rolling on his grave and saying: FFS, give me a break man.

Zeeshan, most of don't know wanted to be a street magician like David Blaine. Perhaps that explains why his shtick in routine is always FORCED.

Many old heads like ATMR, Zunaid and Sohel have gone missing. Then again Banglacricket is so addictive, some will find ANY WAY TO GET THEIR FIX.

Then we have Donal from Ireland and Brockley from Australia. Donal has grown especially fond of Banglacricket website which proxies part time in Irish squad.

Alert reader will point out a page cannot actually play cricket. To which Shamim Chowdhury said, what about Artillery Ground 1787 when the squires, knaves and yeomen dropped their jousting habits and took up a new profession?

Shamim as you may have known enjoys hawking, bear baiting, playing whist, falconry and concocting new, unusual and unheard of sketches in zule shades of sejant lions in vexillological tomes of heraldry. (Yeah, much like his commentary, it makes NO SENSE AT ALL WHATSOEVER.)

Of course, I'd be remissed if I didn't bring up the other duo. Athar Ali Khan. Athar Ali Khan as you know is best know for his 82, that too against Pakistan in 1997 (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Athar_Ali_Khan).

We....also...have...match adda..... Yes... poor dude was jarred to the core after signing a dotted line mortgaging his house in Purbachal alottment.... Hence...the....

DinRaat is also trending. In fact if he had any more links, Chung Ling Soo would've gone out of business (https://www.google.com/search?q=chung+ling+soo&source=lnms&tbm=isch&sa=X&ved=0ahUKEwi4i86rt6jUAhXGjFQKHYYQCy0Q_AUICigB&biw=1600&bih=794#tbm=isch&q=chung+ling+soo+linking+rings).

nsurocks has been posting a lot lately. As well as adamnsu. They all hail from the school of NSU fixation. NSU remains the only accredited university in SE Asia to be built in an apartment building above a photocopy machine store selling phensidyl laced original Tiger energy drink that Ayub Bacchu once held. NSU's motto is "Seek knowledge, in case flash mob dancing never pays off..."

Finally, we have roman, jeesh and tiger1000. Roman, as you know, lives in New York, jeesh in Sri Lanka and tiger1000 in Why is Sabbir batting at no. 3? thread.

That's about it for now. I am your host Zeeshan Mahmud. Or as Richard Branson calls: the dude who gave me the muse for my airlines.

June 6, 2017, 12:32 AM
dont quit you day job. oh wait....

June 6, 2017, 01:02 AM
What roast is this, chicken roast?

June 6, 2017, 01:20 AM
dont quit you day job. oh wait....

It's what 3:00 am there? And 45 gets all the blame for his seheri tweets? :)

June 6, 2017, 02:48 AM
lol.. that was a nice read The Zeeshan!

June 6, 2017, 10:51 AM
hilarious :up:

Roey Haque
June 6, 2017, 12:17 PM
Nice read. But very very politically correct. You had to tow the party lines of course, I understand.

June 7, 2017, 02:29 AM
Nice read. But very very politically correct. You had to tow the party lines of course, I understand.

You should rap at people`s weddings, they will be blown away at your rhymes.

BTW is that your real voice, or did you edit it on Audacity

June 7, 2017, 02:42 AM
I just want to put it out there to all the new comers that we really, really appreciate your presence and this was all in joke. Please do not take any of it personally.

As for the battle-hardened seasoned vets, GFY. :p

Roey Haque
June 7, 2017, 10:09 AM
You should rap at people`s weddings, they will be blown away at your rhymes.

BTW is that your real voice, or did you edit it on Audacity

I don't remember if I used any effects. Seems like ages ago. I don't think I used any effects in Audacity, just used it as a recording tool. But in my song about Shakib, I remember deepening the pitch on the chorus.

June 7, 2017, 12:10 PM
Dude, you must really do a Mushy diss. ^^^^ :lol:

June 7, 2017, 12:11 PM
Rip him one bro. I wanna see you do a Em's version of Mariah Carey Warning. :lol: