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  #1  
Old September 24, 2009, 01:30 PM
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Default Champions Trophy in South Africa - India's cricketers urged to have sex

India's cricketers at the Champions Trophy in South Africa are being encouraged by their coach to have sex to boost their on-field performance, a newspaper reports.

The benefits of sex feature prominently in a secret document circulated among players by coach Gary Kirsten and mental conditioning expert Paddy Upton, the Hindustan Times said in a front-page report.

It came as India take on arch-rivals Pakistan in their first Champions Trophy match in Centurion on Saturday.

The large-selling broadsheet, which claimed to have a copy of the document, said the relevant chapter was headlined "Does sex increase performance?".

"Yes it does, so go ahead and indulge," the document said, before detailing the benefits of a good sex life and even suggesting "going solo" if no partners were available.

"From a physiological perspective, having sex increases testosterone levels, which cause an increase in strength, energy, aggression and competitiveness," the document said.

"Conversely, not having sex for a period of a few months causes a significant drop in testosterone levels in both males and females, with the corresponding passiveness and decrease in aggression."

The Indian squad were being tight-lipped about the supposed "vision" document.

Captain MS Dhoni said he wasn't aware of the issue, "his expression clearly betraying him", the Times of India said.

Sachin Tendulkar refused to comment, while Upton said: "It's a lot being made out of nothing, that's simply what it is."

News of the dossier amused cricketers from other nations.

Australian captain Ricky Ponting was left speechless by a giggling fit when asked about it, London's Times said.

“A team vision document on that would be interesting,” he said. “Actually, no, it wouldn’t. That’s all I can say.”

England captain Andrew Strauss said the team's sexual practices had never come up in team documents, while spinner Grame Swann said the idea was “the kind of forward thinking the game needs”.

“I assume he [Kirsten] does not mean within the team. Wives and partners must be involved," he told the Times.

Australian batsman Mike Hussey said: "I have been away from home for four months so I reckon I’ve forgotten how to do it."


The document quoted Tim Noakes, a professor and sports scientist at the University of Cape Town, Kirsten's home town, as saying that "sex was not a problem, but being up till 2:00 am, probably having a few drinks at a bar while trying to pick someone up, on the eve of a game, almost always was".

The document helpfully suggests a solution.

"If you want sex but do not have someone to share it with, one option is to go solo whilst imagining you have a partner, or a few partners, who are as beautiful as you wish to imagine," the document said.

"No pillow talk and no hugging required. Just roll over and go to sleep."

Enforced celibacy may also affect performance, the advice said.

"You may experience that your mind spends more time focusing on the fire in your groin than on good sport practice, preparation and sleep," the document said.

The document also stresses the importance of being aggressive on the field from the start, self-improvement and healthy eating.


source - http://www.smh.com.au/news/sport/cri...385065038.html
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  #2  
Old September 24, 2009, 01:33 PM
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Funniest cricketing article I have ever read
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  #3  
Old September 24, 2009, 01:47 PM
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Hashte Hashte Sesh (HHS)
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  #4  
Old September 24, 2009, 02:04 PM
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Does this mean WAGs will be allowed on tours from now on? As it turns out, according to the fake IPL player, our guys aren't great picker-uppers-at-bars, so having their partners flown in might actually prove beneficial.
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Old September 24, 2009, 02:37 PM
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I think for long tour WAG's should be allowed. Now a days players have to travel so much that it is very logical for the WAGs to tour with them. I support this idea.
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Old September 25, 2009, 09:37 PM
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Wow! What an article....although why should there be quotes around going solo is beyond me....anyhoo cant wait for tomorrows Pak vs Ind game!
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  #7  
Old September 26, 2009, 12:54 AM
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Kirsten has already denied it. It's a rumor, a bad one.
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Old September 26, 2009, 10:10 AM
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this is a bullshit article
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  #9  
Old September 29, 2009, 01:23 AM
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But Funny............
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  #10  
Old September 29, 2009, 06:42 AM
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yup this is funny and thanks god this stupid article is a rumour .

in b/w this is funny !

Australian captain Ricky Ponting was left speechless by a giggling fit when asked about it, London's Times said.
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