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Forget Cricket Talk about anything [within Board Rules, of course :) ]

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  #1  
Old April 26, 2017, 08:55 PM
Zeeshan's Avatar
Zeeshan Zeeshan is offline
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Join Date: March 9, 2008
Location: Ω
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Default Your Tinder Experiences?

I don't know if they have Tinder in Bangladesh and other counties, but here are some of my experiences.

Now although I prefer to be hit on by women naturally at stores, grocery and bars after much insistence from a friend I decided to d/l (download) Tinder. What followed were three horrible encounters in my life.

Case # 1 Jennifer M.

For those who don't know Tinder likes to pit your profile against similar user of "strengths" much like how chess.com pits you against opponents of your own level. Now I am a very handsome guy, so on the first day I found a lot of "matches" from random women.

I was particularly bored that day, so I thought I'd respond to her repeated calls and texts. She was pretty lame with lines such a "Who made you? Henry Ford...cuz you are like Model Z." (Yawn). Anyhoo, I had extra cash to spare, so I met her in Starbox for coffee.

She refilled her cup three times costing me $15.00. That I don't mind, but then she started getting frisky and touching my biceps and playing footsie.

She nonchalantly asked me about my car. I didn't pay much attention to it. Since I was visibly getting bored and declined her request to watch movies at her apartment, I went home and...

Boy was I in for a surprise next morning. That psycho chick keyed my car. That's when I realize why she was inquiring about what I drive.

#nevertinder #horrible

Question: Should I contact the app company and tell me about my problem?


Case # 2 Lilian B.


Lilian was weird. And that was precisely I liked her. She was like "But all you dark skinned middle easterns are ugly, how come you are a stud?" and then she was like "I want to swim in the gene pool that you dove in all your life.." Whatever. Yawn. But she was a junkie.

After spending $210 in a posh restaurant, she felt like doing crystal. And I had to stop my keyed car, give her money to pick her stash from some homeless guy and then drop her to a different county 60 miles away from here.

And after I came back, i found a creepy message in my wallet with her name and number.

#nevertinder #horribleexperienceswithtinder

Case # 3: Sundae D.

Now most people ask me, someone like you, who been there and saw it all, kinda like the astronomer effect, whom nothing can phase, and nothing can raze..what do YOU do for kicks?

So I was like when you get so bored with life, you date a fat chick. Although Tinder would never dare suggest girls below my league, I put up a fake profile and then got immediately hooked with a lonely, desperate girl.

Sundae wore a wiry glass and was intelligent. Her parents must have foreshadowed her eponymous upbringing hence the moniker... Anyhoo, I took her to Outback's Steak and she kept ordering and ordering and then she said if she'd like to take me to her car for a drink. So we got kinda personal in the car and she had too many shots to pack and suddenly as we were making out, she threw up in my Giorgio Emporio Armani suit.

#nevertinder #tinderhorridexperiences

Share your Tinder stories.
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  #2  
Old April 26, 2017, 09:02 PM
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aklemalp aklemalp is offline
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Join Date: September 5, 2009
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Is this the app you swipe when you see profiles desperate as yours?
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  #3  
Old April 26, 2017, 09:07 PM
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Zeeshan Zeeshan is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by aklemalp
Is this the app you swipe when you see profiles desperate as yours?
Okay time out... pretty sure the meaning somehow, somewhere got lost in translation.
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  #4  
Old April 27, 2017, 02:42 AM
DinRaat. DinRaat. is offline
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Join Date: January 30, 2017
Location: Sydney Australia
Favorite Player: AirBus A340
Posts: 5,635

Are you uh.......Bangladeshi?
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  #5  
Old April 27, 2017, 05:51 AM
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Nafi Nafi is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by aklemalp
Is this the app you swipe when you see profiles desperate as yours?
Yes.

Zeeshan did these stories really happen?
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  #6  
Old April 27, 2017, 06:09 AM
DinRaat. DinRaat. is offline
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This is more ****ed up then my stories of playing with Russians in Dota 2
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  #7  
Old April 27, 2017, 06:48 AM
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Shingara Shingara is offline
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Location: AWACS
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Zeeshan bhai, ami ken jani no. 3 ta Sunny Leone money korsilam.
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  #8  
Old April 27, 2017, 08:15 AM
iDumb iDumb is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Nafi
Yes.

Zeeshan did these stories really happen?
only in his dreams. His food stamps money going the distance there.
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  #9  
Old April 27, 2017, 09:33 AM
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aklemalp aklemalp is offline
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Join Date: September 5, 2009
Location: Guyana,South America
Favorite Player: Rahkeem Cornwall
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Zeeshan
Okay time out... pretty sure the meaning somehow, somewhere got lost in translation.
I am serious and curious.

I watched a Family Guy episode once, where Quagmire discovered an app that allowed him to swipe to hook up with people...

The rest is not suitable for this forum.
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  #10  
Old April 27, 2017, 04:07 PM
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Zeeshan Zeeshan is offline
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Join Date: March 9, 2008
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Quote:
Originally Posted by iDumb
only in his dreams. His food stamps money going the distance there.
There once was a rakha'al boy who cried fire in the library. These were all false alarms. So no one took him seriously. Then one day a real fire broke out and then the rakha'al boy shouted and shouted and no one paid any attention and then the whole library burned down and got destroyed.

Moral: Don't assume everything is lies.
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  #11  
Old April 28, 2017, 04:46 PM
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Shingara Shingara is offline
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Join Date: March 6, 2016
Location: AWACS
Favorite Player: Ziya
Posts: 1,309

Quote:
Originally Posted by Zeeshan
There once was a rakha'al boy who cried fire in the library. These were all false alarms. So no one took him seriously. Then one day a real fire broke out and then the rakha'al boy shouted and shouted and no one paid any attention and then the whole library burned down and got destroyed.

Moral: Don't assume everything is lies.
Rakhal librarytey ki kortesilo ? Ajkal goru-sagol ki boiyer pata chibay naki ? Ar fire button tip dilei hoy. Gola fataiya chillaitey hoy na
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  #12  
Old April 28, 2017, 05:40 PM
brockley brockley is offline
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Join Date: August 8, 2007
Posts: 2,919

Not used tinder,wonder what its like?
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  #13  
Old January 20, 2018, 10:32 AM
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Zeeshan Zeeshan is offline
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Join Date: March 9, 2008
Location: Ω
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acha tindar e hit pawa etu tuff kano?

i am back on tinder guys. what do i ahve to do to get hit? help a brother out
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  #14  
Old January 20, 2018, 04:52 PM
One World One World is offline
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Join Date: May 18, 2005
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Favorite Player: Mominul Haque
Posts: 20,759

I wish Tinder could be like Uber, you know you could rate each other after reaching your destination in others’ car.
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  #15  
Old January 20, 2018, 05:08 PM
Yankees Yankees is offline
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Join Date: February 10, 2017
Location: New York
Favorite Player: Sanga,Mash,Shakib,Fizz
Posts: 3,092

Quote:
Originally Posted by Zeeshan
I don't know if they have Tinder in Bangladesh and other counties, but here are some of my experiences.

Now although I prefer to be hit on by women naturally at stores, grocery and bars after much insistence from a friend I decided to d/l (download) Tinder. What followed were three horrible encounters in my life.

Case # 1 Jennifer M.

For those who don't know Tinder likes to pit your profile against similar user of "strengths" much like how chess.com pits you against opponents of your own level. Now I am a very handsome guy, so on the first day I found a lot of "matches" from random women.

I was particularly bored that day, so I thought I'd respond to her repeated calls and texts. She was pretty lame with lines such a "Who made you? Henry Ford...cuz you are like Model Z." (Yawn). Anyhoo, I had extra cash to spare, so I met her in Starbox for coffee.

She refilled her cup three times costing me $15.00. That I don't mind, but then she started getting frisky and touching my biceps and playing footsie.

She nonchalantly asked me about my car. I didn't pay much attention to it. Since I was visibly getting bored and declined her request to watch movies at her apartment, I went home and...

Boy was I in for a surprise next morning. That psycho chick keyed my car. That's when I realize why she was inquiring about what I drive.

#nevertinder #horrible

Question: Should I contact the app company and tell me about my problem?


Case # 2 Lilian B.


Lilian was weird. And that was precisely I liked her. She was like "But all you dark skinned middle easterns are ugly, how come you are a stud?" and then she was like "I want to swim in the gene pool that you dove in all your life.." Whatever. Yawn. But she was a junkie.

After spending $210 in a posh restaurant, she felt like doing crystal. And I had to stop my keyed car, give her money to pick her stash from some homeless guy and then drop her to a different county 60 miles away from here.

And after I came back, i found a creepy message in my wallet with her name and number.

#nevertinder #horribleexperienceswithtinder

Case # 3: Sundae D.

Now most people ask me, someone like you, who been there and saw it all, kinda like the astronomer effect, whom nothing can phase, and nothing can raze..what do YOU do for kicks?

So I was like when you get so bored with life, you date a fat chick. Although Tinder would never dare suggest girls below my league, I put up a fake profile and then got immediately hooked with a lonely, desperate girl.

Sundae wore a wiry glass and was intelligent. Her parents must have foreshadowed her eponymous upbringing hence the moniker... Anyhoo, I took her to Outback's Steak and she kept ordering and ordering and then she said if she'd like to take me to her car for a drink. So we got kinda personal in the car and she had too many shots to pack and suddenly as we were making out, she threw up in my Giorgio Emporio Armani suit.

#nevertinder #tinderhorridexperiences

Share your Tinder stories.
It only costs 50 cents to refill your cup at Starbucks. I knew this story was BS. Everything else was fine but you expect me to believe that Starbucks don't provide 50 cent refills? Get outta here.
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  #16  
Old January 20, 2018, 06:36 PM
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Zeeshan Zeeshan is offline
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Join Date: March 9, 2008
Location: Ω
Favorite Player: Rohit Sharma
Posts: 33,571

acha eta ki shotti...ekbar releshinship e porle naki ar jibonei kono meyer mukh dekha jay na?
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  #17  
Old January 24, 2018, 01:22 AM
epitaph's Avatar
epitaph epitaph is offline
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Join Date: July 18, 2007
Posts: 1,364

Quote:
Originally Posted by Zeeshan
I don't know if they have Tinder in Bangladesh and other counties, but here are some of my experiences.

Now although I prefer to be hit on by women naturally at stores, grocery and bars after much insistence from a friend I decided to d/l (download) Tinder. What followed were three horrible encounters in my life.

Case # 1 Jennifer M.

For those who don't know Tinder likes to pit your profile against similar user of "strengths" much like how chess.com pits you against opponents of your own level. Now I am a very handsome guy, so on the first day I found a lot of "matches" from random women.

I was particularly bored that day, so I thought I'd respond to her repeated calls and texts. She was pretty lame with lines such a "Who made you? Henry Ford...cuz you are like Model Z." (Yawn). Anyhoo, I had extra cash to spare, so I met her in Starbox for coffee.

She refilled her cup three times costing me $15.00. That I don't mind, but then she started getting frisky and touching my biceps and playing footsie.

She nonchalantly asked me about my car. I didn't pay much attention to it. Since I was visibly getting bored and declined her request to watch movies at her apartment, I went home and...

Boy was I in for a surprise next morning. That psycho chick keyed my car. That's when I realize why she was inquiring about what I drive.

#nevertinder #horrible

Question: Should I contact the app company and tell me about my problem?


Case # 2 Lilian B.


Lilian was weird. And that was precisely I liked her. She was like "But all you dark skinned middle easterns are ugly, how come you are a stud?" and then she was like "I want to swim in the gene pool that you dove in all your life.." Whatever. Yawn. But she was a junkie.

After spending $210 in a posh restaurant, she felt like doing crystal. And I had to stop my keyed car, give her money to pick her stash from some homeless guy and then drop her to a different county 60 miles away from here.

And after I came back, i found a creepy message in my wallet with her name and number.

#nevertinder #horribleexperienceswithtinder

Case # 3: Sundae D.

Now most people ask me, someone like you, who been there and saw it all, kinda like the astronomer effect, whom nothing can phase, and nothing can raze..what do YOU do for kicks?

So I was like when you get so bored with life, you date a fat chick. Although Tinder would never dare suggest girls below my league, I put up a fake profile and then got immediately hooked with a lonely, desperate girl.

Sundae wore a wiry glass and was intelligent. Her parents must have foreshadowed her eponymous upbringing hence the moniker... Anyhoo, I took her to Outback's Steak and she kept ordering and ordering and then she said if she'd like to take me to her car for a drink. So we got kinda personal in the car and she had too many shots to pack and suddenly as we were making out, she threw up in my Giorgio Emporio Armani suit.

#nevertinder #tinderhorridexperiences

Share your Tinder stories.
Sounds legit.
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  #18  
Old January 24, 2018, 01:56 AM
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Jadukor Jadukor is offline
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Join Date: October 17, 2010
Favorite Player: Shakib, Brian Lara
Posts: 12,959

Quote:
Originally Posted by Zeeshan
acha tindar e hit pawa etu tuff kano?

i am back on tinder guys. what do i ahve to do to get hit? help a brother out
Have you tried messaging a Meaow to Shabbir on Tinder?
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  #19  
Old January 24, 2018, 03:57 PM
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Tigers_eye Tigers_eye is offline
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Join Date: June 30, 2005
Location: Little Rock
Favorite Player: Viv Richards, Steve Waugh
Posts: 31,464

Dear papis (bangalis),
Do not fall for Zee's tricks. Allow me to sell the high court. A little advance payment is required. Not to fund my commission but to pay off the legal fees that is required in selling the high court. Them Lawyers are bad ....fos. So just tell me who wants to go first. We only have one high court. Highest bidder who would guarantee the highest deposit will be the lucky guy.
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