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Forget Cricket Talk about anything [within Board Rules, of course :) ] |
July 19, 2013, 01:58 PM
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First Class Cricketer
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Join Date: April 17, 2013
Location: City of Joy :)
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Funny One Liners
A thread dedicated to funny quotes and saying, with just one small condition - they'll have to be original. So let the fun begin.
I'll start with a few. Laughing is not mandatory. But if you do, laugh at the humour, not in my attempt of it.
Quote:
You know apocalypse has arrived when your internet's upload speed is faster than it's download speed.
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Quote:
That awkward moment when you wake up 2 hours earlier than normal, and give a status update about it before going to bed again.
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Quote:
I'm not stupid, I just don't want to figure everything out myself.
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Quote:
I'm not only what I am, but I'm also what you're not and what someone else might be.
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Quote:
You have no right to judge people around you........so send them directly to the executioner.
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Quote:
If you think you're sitting idle, remember you're inside a vehicle called Earth moving around 30 km/sec.
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Quote:
Never walk alone........hire a crowd.
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The last one is a bit of self realisation.
Quote:
My sense of humour is humourously nonsense.
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more to come....
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You can be the ripest, juiciest peach in the world, and there will always be someone who hates peaches.
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July 19, 2013, 04:12 PM
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Cricket Legend
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Join Date: February 4, 2012
Location: Meherpur, Kushtia
Favorite Player: Imrul "The Don" Kayes
Posts: 7,584
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You know you're dreaming when you see Bangladesh winning a match
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July 20, 2013, 05:09 AM
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First Class Cricketer
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Join Date: April 17, 2013
Location: City of Joy :)
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Posts: 472
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No updates? No problem. I can't be so easily discouraged.
4 more.
Quote:
Stand side by side with the person you're bargaining with. That way, you'll never find yourself in the wrong end of the bargain.
My phones spell chek option does not work.
My favourite song ever: The one that I don't have to hear Justin Bieber sing.
Think you can blame me for everything? Well then blame yourself for meeting me in the first place.
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__________________
You can be the ripest, juiciest peach in the world, and there will always be someone who hates peaches.
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July 21, 2013, 11:28 PM
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Cricket Sage
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Join Date: May 18, 2005
Location: New England
Favorite Player: Mominul Haque
Posts: 24,706
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I wish Binary was not invented, that way we could have a computer to replicate Strings.
Hell is as exothermic as Hawkins is.
If Archimedes did not shout Eureka without clothes on, people would not shout the same after landing in western Europe.
If Persepolis is true then Sarpita is a treacherous citizen.
Newton certainly was short-sighted otherwise he would have found better things than Calculus on the proverbial sea-shore.
The Galileo test for gravity was not verified considering the angular position of the Pissa temple so is Amy's comment about Penny in the tenure episode of TBBT.
Inside a university the physics department is easiest to find as it is always adjacent to an apple orchard.
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À vaincre sans péril, on triomphe sans gloire.
Last edited by One World; July 21, 2013 at 11:41 PM..
Reason: Added more
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July 22, 2013, 12:14 AM
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Cricket Sage
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Join Date: May 18, 2005
Location: New England
Favorite Player: Mominul Haque
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My one-liner for the open wall on the Birthday of Facebook:
Do not steal or plagiarize ground breaking ideas of other people as the payback can be as large as the entire budget of Gates Foundation.
(Karma is a biatch, really!)
__________________
À vaincre sans péril, on triomphe sans gloire.
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July 22, 2013, 02:55 AM
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First Class Cricketer
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Join Date: April 17, 2013
Location: City of Joy :)
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^^ One World.
4 more....
"Abilities should match circumstances. You being able to fly won't help you survive underwater."
"My love for you is infinite, all you need is to divide by zero."
"The only sure thing your next phone will have is lesser battery."
"Age is in the mind, so when you grow old, please don't mind."
__________________
You can be the ripest, juiciest peach in the world, and there will always be someone who hates peaches.
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July 22, 2013, 03:47 AM
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BanglaCricket Staff BC - Bangladesh Representative
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Join Date: February 28, 2005
Location: Here
Favorite Player: Father of BD Cricket
Posts: 20,540
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^^ Love you sig.
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Verily, in the remembrance of Allah do hearts find rest [Al-Qur'an,13:28]
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July 22, 2013, 04:36 AM
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Moderator
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Join Date: May 31, 2010
Location: Dhaka,BD
Favorite Player: Tamim,Ash,Mash,Shakib
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Quote:
Originally Posted by sum_1
^^ One World.
4 more....
"Abilities should match circumstances. You being able to fly won't help you survive underwater."
"My love for you is infinite, all you need is to divide by zero."
"The only sure thing your next phone will have is lesser battery."
"Age is in the mind, so when you grow old, please don't mind."
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Posted via BC Mobile Edition (Opera Mobile)
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July 22, 2013, 09:35 AM
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Cricket Sage
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Join Date: May 18, 2005
Location: New England
Favorite Player: Mominul Haque
Posts: 24,706
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Quote:
Originally Posted by sum_1
"Abilities should match circumstances. You being able to fly won't help you survive underwater."
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^ You may divide that by zero!
Since Rajnikant hit a social pariah with a pariah dog the tail failed to straighten ever.
By his accent Ananta Jalil beat the Great Britain hands down, no need of Shakib/Tamim et. al. (Are you pom Gana)
Travelling in tube light years can only get you near by the hilarity of OW OLs.
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À vaincre sans péril, on triomphe sans gloire.
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July 22, 2013, 04:37 PM
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Cricket Sage
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Join Date: February 27, 2006
Location: Connecticut
Posts: 17,886
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This is what some 50+ year old dude said at my work few weeks ago.
You should get charged with rape and murder, for 'f***ing' around and 'killing' time.
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July 22, 2013, 10:47 PM
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First Class Cricketer
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Join Date: July 2, 2003
Location: Dhaka
Posts: 253
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these one liners are awesome!
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July 23, 2013, 12:39 AM
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Cricket Legend
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Join Date: February 4, 2012
Location: Meherpur, Kushtia
Favorite Player: Imrul "The Don" Kayes
Posts: 7,584
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Ajfar
This is what some 50+ year old dude said at my work few weeks ago.
You should get charged with rape and murder, for 'f***ing' around and 'killing' time.
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I LOL'd at this one.
AHAHAHAHAHA
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July 23, 2013, 01:19 AM
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First Class Cricketer
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Join Date: April 17, 2013
Location: City of Joy :)
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Great. Keep them coming guys.
phore more....
"I'm not skinny, I just work out my bones."
"We can be anyone and achieve anything....as long as we stay online."
"I like to dream. I just don't like to pursue them."
"The only consolation I feel being old is that I would've probably been a fan of Justin Bieber if I was young."
__________________
You can be the ripest, juiciest peach in the world, and there will always be someone who hates peaches.
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July 23, 2013, 11:05 AM
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First Class Cricketer
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Join Date: April 17, 2013
Location: City of Joy :)
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Posts: 472
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LOL lets keep it clean, no R rated stuff please. At least not in a direct manner.
My FB status today:
"When I was a kid, I used to read books with lots of pictures. It hasn't changed since."
__________________
You can be the ripest, juiciest peach in the world, and there will always be someone who hates peaches.
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July 23, 2013, 12:36 PM
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Cricket Sage
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Join Date: May 18, 2005
Location: New England
Favorite Player: Mominul Haque
Posts: 24,706
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My citizenship card is delayed due to recent flood in China.
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À vaincre sans péril, on triomphe sans gloire.
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July 24, 2013, 01:14 PM
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First Class Cricketer
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Join Date: April 17, 2013
Location: City of Joy :)
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Posts: 472
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another boundary...
"I'm not selfish. When I listen to music, I make sure the whole neighborhood listens as well."
"My favourite exercise in strength training - Power nap."
"There is a fine line between living on the edge and jumping over it."
"Biggest key to a lock? A chainsaw. It even looks like one."
__________________
You can be the ripest, juiciest peach in the world, and there will always be someone who hates peaches.
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July 25, 2013, 01:57 PM
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Cricket Savant
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Join Date: March 9, 2008
Location: Ω
Posts: 35,906
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"if zeeshan could take one thing to a desert island, it'd be......his mirror"- zeeshan
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July 26, 2013, 01:05 PM
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First Class Cricketer
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Join Date: April 17, 2013
Location: City of Joy :)
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a quick 2....
"I have insomnia. But I don't lose any sleep over it."
"I'll always be there for you, but I get to choose where and when."
__________________
You can be the ripest, juiciest peach in the world, and there will always be someone who hates peaches.
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July 29, 2013, 11:39 AM
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First Class Cricketer
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Join Date: April 17, 2013
Location: City of Joy :)
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Posts: 472
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hehe boundary again....
"You should always trust your banker....only just not with your money."
"There is no such thing as blessing in disguise. It's simply someone or something trying to screw you up and failing miserably."
"Rome was not built in a day, but the universe was created with a big bang."
"Size does matter. If ants were as big as elephants, they'd have dominated this planet."
__________________
You can be the ripest, juiciest peach in the world, and there will always be someone who hates peaches.
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July 30, 2013, 06:22 AM
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Banned
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Join Date: March 19, 2011
Posts: 1,096
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Quotes from Person of Interest :
" In the end we are all alone, and no one is coming to save you"
"What is Pi ? Pi is your entire life from the first word you spoke to everything in your life "
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August 7, 2013, 06:09 AM
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First Class Cricketer
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Join Date: April 17, 2013
Location: City of Joy :)
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Posts: 472
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Another 4 of my own....hehe
"Its not dark. I just turned the black light on."
"Those who live under a rock will leave no stone unturned to remain as thick as one."
"If you were clever enough, you'd have yourself figured it out by now that you're an idiot."
"I'm halfway in taking criticism positively. As of now, I only take the good ones."
__________________
You can be the ripest, juiciest peach in the world, and there will always be someone who hates peaches.
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