facebook Twitter RSS Feed YouTube StumbleUpon

Home | Forum | Chat | Tours | Articles | Pictures | News | Tools | History | Tourism | Search

 
 


Go Back   BanglaCricket Forum > Cricket > Cricket

Cricket Join fellow Tigers fans to discuss all things Cricket

Reply
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
  #1  
Old July 4, 2008, 08:19 PM
Sohel's Avatar
Sohel Sohel is offline
Cricket Savant
 
Join Date: April 18, 2007
Location: Dhaka
Favorite Player: Nazimuddin
Posts: 35,464
Thumbs up Problems Solved: BCB Finds The Solution At Long Last !

After an exhaustive and secret search for the solution to all of our problems, BCB and its talent scouts have found the guys to take us to the next level.

The following information has been leaked under strict conditions of total anonymity by a gleefully giddy former street cricketer now occupying an important post in the BCB governing body. He shall remain unnamed, obhiasly.


***


Baulda, ready to go with his abilities "harnessed", and his local coach right before practice.

1. Baulod Chowdhury, typical all-rounder, remote village, Kurhigram: Discovered by Korean Evangelist dentists who have lived in Bangladesh long enough to care about our cricket, Chowdhury is a big, muscular and gutless player totally devoid of intelligence and free will.

That makes him the perfect candidate to follow the National Coach’s famous “team rules” and take our cricket to the next level.

Baulda, as he is affectionately called by his friends and local fans, needs to be fed regularly, and those who feed him, will get him to do pretty much whatever they want with mind-numbing consistency.

He will block juicy half-volleys and juicier full tosses and like it. He will occupy the crease at ALL costs and be totally oblivious to the match situation or the dire consequences of his actions to his teammates.

The so called and vastly overrated “will to win”? Not our Baulda! With his singular ability to focus only on the details taught to him, he sees only trees, and will never be interested in the forest.

Quote:
“We’re really stoked about Chad, dude !” - said Alex originally known as Akkas, after nicely anglicizing Chowdhury’s surname out of a habitual inferiority complex. Alex, a 17YO posh English medium student in Dhaka, added later on his way to an exclusive rehab- “Lyk, he’ll bring stability to our middle order har hamra matchgula jtta shuru khorbo thaukhon.
Right you are Alex, and I am TOTALLY excited too !!! …

Looking forward to much needed stability in our top order also. I see a test opener here, or an ODI opener who can give us the start to play all 50 overs.

***


Talukdar, the next superstar of Bangladeshi cricket, poses for Cricinfo and the ladies.

2. Ramchhagol Talukdar, genuine seaming all-rounder, border village, Chhagolnaiya: Discovered by BDR sentries, Talukdar is easily the top stud in his Union (county). Sporting a magnetic personality and sexy smile -- framed by a stylish goatee untrimmed enough escape the wrath of local Jamaat-e-Islami “caders” and their fondness for Bangladeshi mutton -- he is a big, strong, and handsome athletic specimen by Bangladeshi standards, and definitely has a mind of his own.

Jumping over the border barbed-wire and looking for Bollywood grass, he has dodged many a bullet from psychotic BSF sentries from the other side in Tripura, India. That oft-repeated experience, instead of making him skittish and frightened, has made him stubborn and completely fearless.

The more BSF bullets he managed to dodge, the more he wanted to dodge in the future. He lives in the moment and takes all comers, no matter what the consequence for himself or HIS team.

Quote:
“Ej e zenuain ishrok mekar, karez ij diphyning hij kiriket”- said Lance Nayek Mridha, a former student of Philosophy in Zoghonnat Unibharsity Kolez who came to realize his folly before it was too late, - “Ramu ij e nesaral mes uinar uid buth bet end bol”.
Spot on brother ! I salute you my sleepless guardian. I have been sleeping under the flag of freedom you and your comrades provide each and every night, and now you’ve found us our own Andrew Flintoff and Albie Morkel rolled in one bold package …

RaTa can easily get us the PP runs we need as an opener or a pinch-hitting number 3. If he's tired from all the grunting as a genuine new ball bowler, we can count on him to come-in later and slog away in the death overs. In fact, his electrifying presence in front of the stumps, and the well-documented hypnotic effects of those "bedroom eyes", are bound to render the Muralis, Lees, Steyns, Haydens, McCullums and Sangakkaras of the world wish they played kho-kho instead.

As the Lance Nayek put it so eloquently before I boarded my rickshaw: -

Quote:
Bharchhitiliti ij di ki tu chhakchhechh.
***


KS at home, "harnessing" his potential and enjoying a private moment of thoughless bliss.

3. Sagol Miya AKA Kala Sagol, ambidextrous batsman who can bowl a bit, anywhere, any bausti (shanty/slum), Dhaka: Diminutive, cute and almost shy, KS is the latest in a long line of short and hardworking Bangladeshi batsmen who can hit booming 6s and 4s to everyone’s shock and awe.

Grateful to be noticed, he will "eat" whatever instruction you feed him.

Bowling-wise, his gentle 109-112ers tend to shock the opponent into making silly mistakes and give their wickets away.

Perhaps much more than just a “bits and pieces” player, KS is young and will improve before we know it.

Another ideal fit into the National Coach’s “process” for our development, he will be challenged with the new ball to embark upon the glorious path to self-discovery.

Quote:
“We’re helping him discover who he really is inside, and go beyond his limits” said Moe originally known as Mofees, the US-trained NGO activist who brought this potentially valuable asset to light - “talent has let us down, and since I never got more than a C in my whole life, I figured all salvation lies in the celebration of mediocrity. On topic, KS can bat or bowl anywhere, depending on the match situation."
Moe works for an NGO that has introduced local shanties and slums to the joys of abstract expressionist art.

Right on bro, art will set our souls free! Food and jobs? That’s just materialistic BS for the spiritually deprived!!! …
__________________
"And do not curse those who call on other than GOD, lest they blaspheme and curse GOD, out of ignorance. We have adorned the works of every group in their eyes. Ultimately, they return to their Lord, then He informs them of everything they had done." (Qur'an 6:108)

Last edited by Sohel; July 6, 2008 at 06:09 AM..
Reply With Quote

  #2  
Old July 4, 2008, 11:44 PM
Kabir's Avatar
Kabir Kabir is offline
Cricket Guru
 
Join Date: September 3, 2006
Location: Mississauga, Ontario
Favorite Player: Sakib - the real Tiger
Posts: 11,198

hashte koshto hoche...tobuo hashteesi
__________________
cricket is a PROCESS, not an EVENT or two. -- Sohel_NR
Fans need to stop DUI (Dreaming Under Influence)!
Reply With Quote
  #3  
Old July 5, 2008, 01:31 AM
kalpurush's Avatar
kalpurush kalpurush is offline
Moderator
 
Join Date: June 7, 2005
Location: Victoria: Heaven's Earth!
Posts: 19,171

Sohel bhai....I guess you are related to our beloved Babu bhai! Ya, right!!?
Enjoyed as much as I could!!!
__________________
> Start slow. Build a base. Then explode.
> I needed to perform so that I could give my countrymen an occasion to cherish and be proud of - Ice Man
> My photographs @ flickr http://www.flickr.com/photos/obayedh/
Reply With Quote
  #4  
Old July 5, 2008, 03:12 AM
cricket_king's Avatar
cricket_king cricket_king is offline
Cricket Legend
 
Join Date: January 10, 2007
Location: Sydney, Australia
Posts: 5,860

LOL. Absolutely brilliant. Another masterpiece from Sohel bhai. It's funny how these articles come in right after another humiliation.
__________________
A friend in need is a friend indeed; a friend with weed is better.
Reply With Quote
  #5  
Old July 5, 2008, 03:38 AM
Niceman70 Niceman70 is offline
First Class Cricketer
 
Join Date: April 30, 2005
Location: NYC, USA
Favorite Player: Tamim and Shakib
Posts: 480

awesome..
__________________
Those who still have their parents living please don't forget to do your best to your parents. Cause you never know when the opportunity will be gone.-- Warwolf
Reply With Quote
  #6  
Old July 5, 2008, 03:58 AM
nasimul's Avatar
nasimul nasimul is offline
Cricket Legend
 
Join Date: October 12, 2004
Location: Stockholm
Posts: 4,722

Great work Sohel bhai.
Reply With Quote
  #7  
Old July 5, 2008, 05:41 AM
israr israr is offline
Test Cricketer
 
Join Date: February 24, 2005
Posts: 1,408

Simply classic!
Reply With Quote
  #8  
Old July 5, 2008, 05:46 AM
israr israr is offline
Test Cricketer
 
Join Date: February 24, 2005
Posts: 1,408

I loved the goat, and his style!
Brillinat piece of work Sohel bhaiyya.
Reply With Quote
  #9  
Old July 5, 2008, 09:44 AM
Rifat's Avatar
Rifat Rifat is offline
Cricket Sage
 
Join Date: March 30, 2007
Location: Connecticut
Favorite Player: Abu Jayed Rahi
Posts: 15,468

i am considering the decision to stop following Bangladesh cricket. a decision i made after 2003 world cup, which i changed after i saw Bangladesh defeated India just last year and i told myself, "o.k. 2003 was an experience for our youn guns, now they have more experience, so the time has come for continuous success... and i started a newfound love for this cricket team"


i have given it a lot of thought lately and after yesterday's abismal performance as much as i love Banglacricket, i have decided to stop following Bangladesh cricket, for certain at this point. it is a total waste of my time.


message to people who still wants to dream about "winning it all"/ still stick to this team:

"i don't know why you are doing it, but don't hurt yourselves"


i will miss BanglaCricket...

Great Thread Sohel NR..
Reply With Quote
  #10  
Old July 5, 2008, 10:02 AM
nycpro96's Avatar
nycpro96 nycpro96 is offline
Cricket Legend
 
Join Date: December 17, 2007
Favorite Player: Tamim Iqbal
Posts: 6,063

Omg LOL this is So fuNNY
__________________
Reporter: You could hit the first ball for 4 couldn't you?
Tamim: Ha, I could hit the first ball for 6, that's not a problem.

Last edited by nycpro96; July 5, 2008 at 10:52 AM.. Reason: mod.content: language
Reply With Quote
  #11  
Old July 5, 2008, 02:05 PM
crikfreak's Avatar
crikfreak crikfreak is offline
Cricket Legend
 
Join Date: March 11, 2008
Location: Sharjah, UAE
Favorite Player: MASHRAFE MORTAZA
Posts: 2,300

simply fantastic!!
Reply With Quote
  #12  
Old July 5, 2008, 02:09 PM
kalpurush's Avatar
kalpurush kalpurush is offline
Moderator
 
Join Date: June 7, 2005
Location: Victoria: Heaven's Earth!
Posts: 19,171

Quote:
Originally Posted by cricket_king
It's funny how these articles come in right after another humiliation.
বিপ্লব সংঘটিত হওয়ার পূর্ব-সুত্র হচ্ছে - নৈরাজ্য আর অরাজকতা
তেমনি,
you need a humilating defeat to motivate our beloved Sohel bhai for this kind of classic!
__________________
> Start slow. Build a base. Then explode.
> I needed to perform so that I could give my countrymen an occasion to cherish and be proud of - Ice Man
> My photographs @ flickr http://www.flickr.com/photos/obayedh/
Reply With Quote
  #13  
Old July 5, 2008, 07:53 PM
Antora's Avatar
Antora Antora is offline
Cricket Guru
 
Join Date: February 28, 2007
Location: melbourne, Australia
Posts: 8,909

OH! that was funny!
Reply With Quote
  #14  
Old July 5, 2008, 10:55 PM
Nafis_BD's Avatar
Nafis_BD Nafis_BD is offline
Cricket Legend
 
Join Date: April 2, 2006
Location: Scarborough, Ontario (Canada)
Favorite Player: BD Team Players
Posts: 3,446

For is this really Sohel bhaiya or is it BB bhaiya? Fantastic job bhaiya....truely FANTASTIC!!!
__________________
Cricket couldn't be changed without changing it's character, and to us, who hold the game dear to our heart, character is everything -Modified by Nafis
Reply With Quote
  #15  
Old July 5, 2008, 11:01 PM
BANFAN's Avatar
BANFAN BANFAN is offline
Cricket Sage
 
Join Date: March 26, 2007
Favorite Player: Bangladesh Team
Posts: 18,760

'Mr. Tony' looks like our Ollie

Good & on time Humour !!
__________________
[Post CWC19 Consistency Record: [B]Test: W-0 L-0 D-0/B]// ODI: W-0 L-3 // T20: W-0 L-0]
Reply With Quote
  #16  
Old July 6, 2008, 06:23 AM
prantika's Avatar
prantika prantika is offline
Club Cricketer
 
Join Date: May 6, 2008
Location: islamabad,pakistan
Favorite Player: tamim iqbal n sakib
Posts: 50

sohel bhaiya,u r truely mindblowing!!!!...
haha.."Baulod Chowdhury,Ramchhagol Talukdar, Sagol Miya AKA Kala Sagol......"...omg...
de names are just perfact!
Reply With Quote
  #17  
Old July 6, 2008, 07:31 AM
lamisa's Avatar
lamisa lamisa is offline
Cricket Legend
 
Join Date: December 18, 2007
Location: Dhaka
Favorite Player: tamim,shafiul,mushy
Posts: 6,743

maan,this is really funny!!!!
__________________
haruk ba jituk,i am always there with BDcricket!!!!
Reply With Quote
  #18  
Old July 6, 2008, 10:19 AM
Sohel's Avatar
Sohel Sohel is offline
Cricket Savant
 
Join Date: April 18, 2007
Location: Dhaka
Favorite Player: Nazimuddin
Posts: 35,464

I fail to see the humor in all this, still a little mad about the rejected pacer I scouted personally -- Gaurdhob Maundol of Bagerhat, known as "Ziyem" (GM, his initials) to his adoring fans.

I guess his half brother Khauchchor Maundol, a former armed "fundraiser" for Purbo Banglar Communist Party, Jaunojuddho Faction, ruined his chances in the big city, no matter how well he promised to "carry the load".

Kayum (KM, his initials), a good SLA who could actually turn the ball before discovering extreme left wing extortion, hasn't been seen since his perhaps ill-fated "RAB encounter" a year ago.

Anyway, I guess we'll have to wait before Ziyem's in and out swingers, and reverse yorkers shooting out of the business end can start terrorizing the likes of Mathew Hayden, Ricky Ponting and Kumar Sangakkara into total submission. Lucky them, unlucky us.


Ziyem Maundol appeals for LBW during the Sundarbans U15 team's tour of Waziristan.
__________________
"And do not curse those who call on other than GOD, lest they blaspheme and curse GOD, out of ignorance. We have adorned the works of every group in their eyes. Ultimately, they return to their Lord, then He informs them of everything they had done." (Qur'an 6:108)

Last edited by Sohel; July 6, 2008 at 08:02 PM..
Reply With Quote
  #19  
Old July 6, 2008, 11:28 AM
Tehsin Tehsin is offline
Administrator
BanglaCricket Founder
 
Join Date: June 20, 2002
Location: Virginia, USA
Favorite Player: তামীম, শা
Posts: 9,471

Only saw the pix of Baulda, shouldn't it be - loving known as BALOD ? Please upload the pix of our other future findings. All we need now is one decent performance by them against a decent team and they could be fast tracked to the national team - that's the biggest legacy of our BCB officials (in recent times).
__________________
Bangladesh - World Champions - World Cup 20**
বাংলাদেশ - বিশ্ব চাম্পিয়ন - বিশ্বকাপ ক্রিকেট ২০**
Reply With Quote
  #20  
Old July 6, 2008, 12:45 PM
Tehsin Tehsin is offline
Administrator
BanglaCricket Founder
 
Join Date: June 20, 2002
Location: Virginia, USA
Favorite Player: তামীম, শা
Posts: 9,471

Talukdar's got the look of a dangerous fast bowler. Amazing goatee.
__________________
Bangladesh - World Champions - World Cup 20**
বাংলাদেশ - বিশ্ব চাম্পিয়ন - বিশ্বকাপ ক্রিকেট ২০**
Reply With Quote
  #21  
Old July 6, 2008, 02:32 PM
Dhruvo Dhruvo is offline
Cricket Legend
 
Join Date: July 9, 2007
Posts: 4,516

Rofl absolute classic ,brilliant article,everything was perfect specially the baulod chowdry part lol.
Reply With Quote
  #22  
Old July 6, 2008, 03:30 PM
PoorFan PoorFan is offline
Moderator
 
Join Date: June 15, 2004
Location: Tokyo <---> Dhaka
Posts: 14,847

Dole goru, chagol ageo chilo, kintu ekhon to dekhi kauwa, kutta, bilai, murgi o ache! eigulir kotha bhuila gele kamne hoibo?
Reply With Quote
  #23  
Old July 17, 2008, 01:35 PM
Tigers_eye's Avatar
Tigers_eye Tigers_eye is offline
Cricket Savant
 
Join Date: June 30, 2005
Location: Little Rock
Favorite Player: Viv Richards, Steve Waugh
Posts: 32,623

long weekend'a BC'tey ashi nai. I missed a lot of things.

As always had a blast reading the thread.

Classic Sohel bhai.
__________________
The Weak can never forgive. Forgiveness is an attribute of the Strong." - Gandhi.
Reply With Quote
  #24  
Old July 17, 2008, 02:04 PM
auntu's Avatar
auntu auntu is offline
Cricket Guru
 
Join Date: March 7, 2007
Location: elsewhere
Favorite Player: ZAR
Posts: 9,894

nice work. excellent pics man.
__________________
﴾اَلَاۤ اِنَّ اَوۡلِيَآءَ اللّٰهِ لَا خَوۡفٌ عَلَيۡهِمۡ وَلَا هُمۡ يَحۡزَنُوۡنَ ۖ ۚ‏ ﴿۶۲
"Listen, the friends of Allah shall have no fear, nor shall they grieve" (Yunus: 62)
Reply With Quote
  #25  
Old July 17, 2008, 06:54 PM
Rifat's Avatar
Rifat Rifat is offline
Cricket Sage
 
Join Date: March 30, 2007
Location: Connecticut
Favorite Player: Abu Jayed Rahi
Posts: 15,468

this has to be the BC thread of the year, this HAS to be!!
Reply With Quote
Reply


Currently Active Users Viewing This Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
 
Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is On



All times are GMT -5. The time now is 11:55 AM.



Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.7
Copyright ©2000 - 2019, vBulletin Solutions, Inc.
BanglaCricket.com
 

About Us | Contact Us | Privacy Policy | Partner Sites | Useful Links | Banners |

© BanglaCricket