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  #1  
Old June 13, 2015, 11:00 PM
iDumb iDumb is offline
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Default Life Lessons

This thread is for people at any age to write down some lessons for younger people or rather for a younger self if they had a chance to do all over again... you can be 20 years old and can leave lessons for 10 to 15 years old.. you can be 85 and leave lessons for 20 to 60 year olds...

This maybe the most valuable thread for some ppl..

I have left the 20s last year and my advice to the ppl in late teens to 20s or a younger me would be the following. A lot of my advice will mostly apply to guys (for girls some of the advice would be different).

1. Take calculated risks in life. Do not always take the safest route.

2. Do not get married in your 20s. Not even if you are 29. Even if you met the perfect girl, DO NOT MARRY her. No one is gonna take her away, if someone is able to do that, then they would be able to do it regardless whether you are married or not. Chances of you meeting another equally or better girl is EXTREMELY HIGH. No girl is that unique even though they may think that. Your goal in 20s is to package yourself to be the perfect 30 year old.

3. Go to college but do not major in your passion. Keep fullfilling your passion as a side. Major in subjects with good employment prospects.. Engineering, Computer science, Business etc. Do not go to masters or phd. If you plan on going to school for that long then instead of masters or phd, aim for professional school.. medicine, pharmacy, dentistry, maybe law

4. Start a business, any business. Fail. Try again. Fail, try again. Fail.. try again. Just do it. There will be a satisfaction in you knowing that you tried and failed than to have never tried ... But if you are that persistent, I highly doubt you will fail repeatedly.

5. save save save... rent a closet in a ghetto area if u have no access to free parent housing..... There is something called delayed gratification...but that delay is NOT till you are 60 but rather till you are in 30s..

6. Make good friends....

7. DOn't waste time. If you have time to browse facebook for hours.. read banglacricket posts, watch day long cricket - you simply aren't doing enough.


-------

But I am also eager to read posts from ppl in 40s 50s 60s ....from grave..
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  #2  
Old June 13, 2015, 11:10 PM
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I think a 10-15 year old is able to leave a lesson for 20+ as well. Why limit by seniority?

Well my only suggestion to the youth is have fun, do not let your dream leave you out of reality.

For example, if you love someone do ask. If you want to be a dancer, go to dance school. Bite like a tortoise. One thing I regret most in my life for not trying hard to go for Bachelors overseas. The session jam and political turmoil killed us in BD. It might have taken same duration if I moved to do undergrad in US/UK (due to lack of finance I might have been taking study breaks to earn in between) but the time spent would have been spent well.

There is nothing more painful than regretful memories with ifs and buts.
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  #3  
Old June 13, 2015, 11:37 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by One World
I think a 10-15 year old is able to leave a lesson for 20+ as well. Why limit by seniority?

If you want to be a dancer, go to dance school. B
The whole point is experience... with age comes certain experience... hence the limitation.. Now a 60 year rickshawpuller shouldn't be giving lessons about college right? but he wouldn't be in this forum either...

anyways that's a terrible advice.. please don't go to dance school.... if u do.. only as a SIDE PASSION like i have mentioned....

Chasing your dream in my opinion is always a bad idea..... one need to be realistic....

I always wanted to raise cows.. a dream of mine... but it is not so realistic...
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Old June 13, 2015, 11:47 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by iDumb
The whole point is experience... with age comes certain experience... hence the limitation.. Now a 60 year rickshawpuller shouldn't be giving lessons about college right? but he wouldn't be in this forum either...

anyways that's a terrible advice.. please don't go to dance school.... if u do.. only as a SIDE PASSION like i have mentioned....

Chasing your dream in my opinion is always a bad idea..... one need to be realistic....

I always wanted to raise cows.. a dream of mine... but it is not so realistic...
I understand why you do not like the idea of chasing your dream. But, this is the very pillar of human endeavor. This makes the difference between being great and obvious. All those ballet dancers or the violin players in an orchestra, we do not know their names but that does not affect anything to each of their persona - they are performing their arts and remains satisfied with the duties and responsibilities they are undertaking towards society.

Did you read the suicide note of the kid who could not get a Golden GPA in recently concluded national test? I am against pressure. It is far more important to remain content than preparing yourself as a tool for the established system.

Raising cows can be realistic too, depending on your vision. The Aftab Dairy Farm or Dannon are doing business and thriving.
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Old June 13, 2015, 11:59 PM
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Agree with you to some extent... I really like your bit on aftab dairy farm or dannon example.. Yes that passion has to translate to something big...

I am not too sure why you mentioned Golden gpa example.. I dont support pressure either....

Some of those famous orchestra has very limited number of players... and the percentage of ppl that make to that level are very low...

My point is you dont want to be in a position where you have a music degree and you play violin in NY subway station for few bucks here and there....

you should always have a back up plan....for example if you want to go into medicine, typically in the US ppl do bio science major... but sometimes med school look at unorthodox applicant ie one majoring in dance more favoribly...if you are in that tract.. that's absolutely fine...

But what if you go to dance school and you are a c grade dancer... then where do you go?
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  #6  
Old June 14, 2015, 12:03 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by iDumb

1. Take calculated risks in life. Do not always take the safest route.
Quote:
Originally Posted by iDumb

anyways that's a terrible advice.. please don't go to dance school....

Chasing your dream in my opinion is always a bad idea..... one need to be realistic....
Anyone else see the contradiction?
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  #7  
Old June 14, 2015, 12:08 AM
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The only lession i will give to the people in their 20s is not to take advice or lessons from random people on the internet. If you need advice then go to people who know you and your background. There is no set template to success. Each individual has to deal with his/her own unique capabilities and environment.
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Old June 14, 2015, 12:10 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Jadukor
Anyone else see the contradiction?
There are no contradictions. Jadukor don't expose your lack of analytical thinking, and show us your poor judgement - I still cant' figure out how some of the brightest guys in this forum chose YOU as a moderator....


THere is no "calculated risk" about going only to dance school... I created this thread to give good advise... not feel good talk...

there are 24 hours in a day... you can do a lot of things than just dance all day...
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Old June 14, 2015, 12:12 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Jadukor
The only lession i will give to the people in their 20s is not to take advice or lessons from random people on the internet. If you need advice then go to people who know you and your background. There is no set template to success. Each individual has to deal with his/her own unique capabilities and environment.
Oh the irony!!!

See lack of analytical prowess... cought offside my friend.



BTW if you didn't get it jadukor.. the irony is that.. you are also a random guy on the net...giving a lesson... oh man my head gonna xplode ..
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Old June 14, 2015, 12:19 AM
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bruh all i see in that list of yours is super bad advice.
Dont do masters? really? 0/10
dont get married by 29? package yourself for a 30 year old? 3/10
start a business? 0/10
save save save? not everyone lives on 80 taka like zee bruh
make good friends. Yes thats a good advice. I am sure nobody befriended you lol.
dont waste time. 10/10. Now i am wondering why i am in this thread. Peace out.
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Old June 14, 2015, 12:27 AM
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Jadukor, I don't think there are any target audience here. I would love to hear some 40 years old with family on what they have to say here.. Thats the idea. I think i can learn something...

I wrote what I would tell a 20 year old me.... will it apply to everyone... no but one can certainly see things differently...

I am guessing you probably have masters and that's how you gotta a job that's y you think advising against masters is a bad idea? Do you mind explaining? HOw masters give you an added advantage? Can you explain why you think starting a business is a bad idea... Tell me i would like to see a different perspective....

you think saving in your 20s is a bad idea? Not everyone is wired to or can tolerate leaching off of their wife..just saying.
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Old June 14, 2015, 12:34 AM
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I have never lived in the US. So you would know the job market over there. All I can say is that a Masters is highly valued in the Asia Pacific region job market. I work for the UN. Without a Masters it would be very hard to get a job in the non profit sector in any international organization. Usually the hiring managers would require that you have 8-9 years of experience to supplement not having a Masters degree.
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Old June 14, 2015, 12:44 AM
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also, you can't suggest to everyone that starting a business is a good idea. Business arena is highly competitive and the market keeps evolving over time and as do the products and services. You really need to have experience in the business you want to venture into and have a business plan that is unique and can really curve out a target customer base for you. I have seen a lot of people think opening restaurants is a good idea without any knowledge of the restaurant/food industry. Everyone looks at the few good restaurants that made it and think I can do the same. Usually most of these businesses go down by the 5th year.
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Old June 14, 2015, 12:51 AM
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I can not disagree with you more even if I want to Jadukor. I am cringing reading your last post.

but.. regarding masters... In USA, it has ZERO value... experience always trumps any education... masters = 8/9 years of experience is a BIG JOKE.

PhD on the other hand can be a good idea depending on what field it is in... But I think one should do PhD in the field only if they truly love it... otherwise the amount of work and dedication it takes can be better served elsewhere in my opinion.
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Old June 14, 2015, 12:52 AM
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No set template in general man... Markets and requirements are quite different
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Old June 14, 2015, 12:55 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by iDumb
I can not disagree with you more even if I want to Jadukor. I am cringing reading your last post.
disagreement is good. It lends perspective. I have shared mine. So if you have a successful startup business without any prior experience please do share. I would be happy to learn a thing or two.
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Old June 14, 2015, 01:17 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Jadukor
disagreement is good. It lends perspective. I have shared mine. So if you have a successful startup business without any prior experience please do share. I would be happy to learn a thing or two.
How are you gonna get experience without trying? That's why I suggested to start at 20s and chances of failing is high and to retry again. I have couple of friends who failed few business till one took off... and both of them said it is that one that makes up for everything....

I don't recommend sitting for an exam without studying first, nor do I recommend buying a stock without understanding the basic fundamentals of the market and some basic knowledge of what a company does. When I say start a business, part of that involves - coming up with a business plan, studying competition, figuring out costs and sales projection, being able to say fancy things like what their customer acquisition cost would be... these are all part of starting a business. I am not here to spell out every single details of it...

Even after all that research and planning, chances are pretty high it will fail. You mentioned an example of some businesses lasting for almost 5 years, that's actually quiet impressive...I can bet that person moved onto another business and not go look for a job at a nonprofit organization....because that's his trade now, he understands it.

if you want to sit in the computer and chat all day then obviously business is not for you.

Every successful business person you talk to they will always tell you they wished they started earlier... Seriously go talk to some...
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Old June 14, 2015, 01:36 AM
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You certainly have the passion to withstand the failures if not the funding. Why so angry bruh. Are you channeling your inner dilscoop today?
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Old June 14, 2015, 12:03 PM
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The routine is the enemy of time, it makes time fly by. You look back at your 19 or even 25 year old self. Then you blick and all of a sudden you are decades older. When you are a kid, everything is astonishing, everything is new. But when you are an adult you understand the pattern of life. This is how you graduate, this is how you find jobs, get a mortgage, pay bills. This is when you establish routine and stop being fascinated about the world anymore.

I would totally do this if I could. It's harder now with job and responsibilities and it will only get harder as I get older and the list of bills and duties only grow. So to my younger self, take a year off from studies and travel and see the world. A year late in graduation, a year of less income won't make a big difference in the long run of life. But you will learn important things in life. More importantly, you will learn lessons no books or jobs can ever give you.

Choose your adventures and create memories.

*I know idumb will greatly object to this.

The Thousand Year Journey: Oregon To Patagonia from Kenny Laubbacher on Vimeo.

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Old June 14, 2015, 12:11 PM
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Perservance trumps everything. In my country, working hard and being honest is the key to success. Being self sufficient is also an advantage. Living life simple is the happiest. There's is no blue print to it. Humans are capable of great things when their backs are against the wall; we are resilient. The cost to being married are always gonna be more in the us compared to other places on earth,
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Old June 14, 2015, 12:54 PM
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Nice thread. A lot of good stuff to learn from everyone.
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Old June 14, 2015, 02:24 PM
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So Gonzalez disagrees about women.

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  #23  
Old June 14, 2015, 03:10 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by mufi_02
or Choose your adventures and create memories.

*I know idumb will greatly object to this.
Absolutely not. This is one of the best ideas coming from this thread. You don't have to take a year off there are study abroad programs ...internship abroad many things ...

Experience over materials at any point in life always ..
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Old June 14, 2015, 06:19 PM
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interesting thread..some good points of discussion. Thing with advice is it needs to be individual specific. general points like those help no one.
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Old June 14, 2015, 11:35 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by G-man
interesting thread..some good points of discussion. Thing with advice is it needs to be individual specific. general points like those help no one.
I think there are some general rule of thumb that applies to most and they should be tweaked based on individual situations.

If you are born to a rich family and you have your future taken care of then by all means explore yourself, take a bike ride and live in mexico, no problem....

But all this exploring can be done once your future is secured... you can take the right steps in your 20s so you don't have to burn your self out in 30s to 40s to pay your bills - instead you can enjoy life...that is the whole idea...

Speaking of enjoying life, i can not stress this enough.. it is one of the most vital aspect of happiness.. being with the right partner. Every aspect of your life might be wonderful but if you are with the wrong person, your life will be miserable....that's why i suggest do not marry in your 20s because your decision making capabilities aren't as sharp...

You want to be with someone who makes you a better person, who can lift you up, can appreciate little things in life...not someone who drags you down..... People like that will only be a hindrance in your life.... Stay away from super jealous and control freaks ..also don't be one either. Jealousy and desire to control you will make them do things that will embarrass you and eventually alienate you from doing things that you enjoy the most...

------------------------------------
more lessons:

8. Eat healthy and exercise routinely. There is nothing more important than being healthy in life.. rest comes after.

9. Dont smoke/Quit already if you do.
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