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  #1  
Old February 27, 2015, 10:52 AM
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Jadukor Jadukor is offline
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Default Urgent! Top Order Vacancy Announcement

Urgent: Top order vacancy announcement (2 positions), Ref OJ-1234

A fairly reputable team with great international exposure and experience is looking for highly qualified individuals to fill its opening position in the batting department. The position comes with avid fan following, attractive salaries, happiness and a high potential of winning apartments, cars, free haircuts and all that only for a below par to moderate performance in the international arena.

Required Core Competencies:

Silent Bob: Does not speak to the media about how ordinary bowlers are these days or how last night’s dream confirmed a win. Only bats and scores runs like Amla.

Proven Biriyani Hater: A lean mean 8 pack Ononto Jalil standard body required. Ok at the very least he should be able to see his toes while looking down from an upright position. While running must not remind of Pamela Anderson to the viewers.

Absence of CSC (Chronic smiling syndrome): Must not smile like an idiot after dropping a dolly. Must not get mesmerized by the big screen and one’s own smile while playing an important innings.

Maggie Noodles Certified: Must be willing and able to stay at the crease longer than Maggie noodles warm up time. Ability to last as long as Goru Bhuna cooking is desirable

Skills: Proficient in coming up with new excuses. Other skills such as taking selfies, knowledge of rice cooker operation, reading kaler kantha will be considered as an advantage

Education: Should be able to communicate at least in banglish during a match presentation. Must be able to translate “there is no chance in hell” sentiments into “if we play to our potential…” at any given press conference

Candidates should remember that only selected individuals will be called for a written exam followed by a competency based interview. The written exam will be a series of true/false questions such as:
i) “Mashallah amra kalkeyr match jitbo” is a correct use of Arabic
ii) Balling valoi hoiyeche is a correct use of banglish
iii) Jekono khelai winner looser thakbei is also a correct use of banglish

Deadline for submission 3rd March 2015
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  #2  
Old February 27, 2015, 10:54 AM
Zunaid Zunaid is offline
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Brilliant - FP material. You game?
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  #3  
Old February 27, 2015, 10:56 AM
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Jadukor Jadukor is offline
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Naah Z bhai.. FP should be serious business not this kind of stuff. This belongs within the BC household and not for public consumption.
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  #4  
Old February 27, 2015, 10:57 AM
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Top class! ++
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  #5  
Old February 27, 2015, 11:03 AM
Zunaid Zunaid is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Jadukor
Naah Z bhai.. FP should be serious business not this kind of stuff. This belongs within the BC household and not for public consumption.
I disagree. Anything literary worth sharing with the world created by our members about our cricket is worth sharing.
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  #6  
Old February 27, 2015, 11:08 AM
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Nadim Nadim is offline
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I seems to meet all the criteria...
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  #7  
Old February 27, 2015, 11:10 AM
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My only wish is to say "Ya JAdukor,talk nah!" after the Scott match,can I wish that ? plz
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  #8  
Old February 27, 2015, 11:13 AM
WarWolf WarWolf is offline
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This is a FP material for sure. It should articulate though facebook as well.

Some people will say the players will be under more pressure due to this. Pressure my foot!!!! Choto doler satheo pressure, boro doler satheo pressure, eki rokom doler satheo pressure!!!
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  #9  
Old February 27, 2015, 11:23 AM
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Tigers_eye Tigers_eye is offline
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lol good one.

Also my wife said to put for testing purposes
Q. Is there any change in the team?
A. Yes. We are having the same team.
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  #10  
Old February 27, 2015, 11:26 AM
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roman roman is offline
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onek din por Jadukor er Jadu dekhlam. Haha. Good one
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  #11  
Old February 27, 2015, 11:26 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Zunaid
I disagree. Anything literary worth sharing with the world created by our members about our cricket is worth sharing.
I second this. This needs to be publicized so that it reaches all the way to the locker room. Fat Tamim and Anamul needs to see this.
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  #12  
Old February 27, 2015, 12:01 PM
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Nasif Nasif is offline
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I agree, should be in FP!
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  #13  
Old February 27, 2015, 12:47 PM
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Rubu Rubu is offline
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I vote for FP as well.
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  #14  
Old February 27, 2015, 12:55 PM
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aklemalp aklemalp is offline
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SKILLS: Sturdy, resilient.
The have to be able to make the new ball change its texture. Not to make it harder for the players coming out after them..
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  #15  
Old February 27, 2015, 01:08 PM
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DarkKnight DarkKnight is offline
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Hahah this is good
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  #16  
Old February 27, 2015, 04:09 PM
Shubho Shubho is offline
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Too freaking funny. But I agree with everything.
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  #17  
Old February 27, 2015, 07:54 PM
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RazabQ RazabQ is offline
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হাসবো না কাঁদবো বুঝছি না So on point that it hurts. Sarcasm at its best.
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  #18  
Old February 27, 2015, 10:52 PM
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naim519 naim519 is offline
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jadukor bhai! You did it again man!
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  #19  
Old February 28, 2015, 03:40 AM
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Nocturnal Nocturnal is offline
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Had to log in ...
Jadukor - good one. Had a good laugh
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  #20  
Old February 28, 2015, 03:59 AM
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naim519 naim519 is offline
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Jadukor bhai, this is for you man,
http://bangladesh-cricket-board.workable.com/jobs/44509


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  #21  
Old February 28, 2015, 04:01 AM
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Jadukor Jadukor is offline
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Wow Naim!!! Great work bro hahaha
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  #22  
Old February 28, 2015, 04:03 AM
iDumb iDumb is offline
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.... great article....top class.... amazing...
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  #23  
Old February 28, 2015, 04:06 AM
iDumb iDumb is offline
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Haha great team work naim ...

Better than our playing Chagols.

Let us know if ashraful applies or not thanks
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  #24  
Old February 28, 2015, 04:11 AM
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Jadukor Jadukor is offline
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Btw ref OJ1234 refers to orange juice and tamim er 4 angul
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  #25  
Old February 28, 2015, 04:16 AM
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naim519 naim519 is offline
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haha nice innuendo there
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