BCB Internal Memo Excerpt Leaked!

[Roey Haque]

MEMO

Dear fellow BCB Directors,

I would like to congratulate you on retaining your positions in the board. You have become richer for it. Through selling tickets on the black market, awarding shady sponsorships which give us money under the table and by giving ourselves generous salaries by stealing the tax payer's money, yes we have done a great job. Never mind that our int. cricketers have the second lowest base salaries among all other full members. That is fine, they will manage, plus they have many leagues anyway, where they can add to their income. But what is paramount is we, the band of brothers forever loyal to the netri, continue to enrich our pockets at the expense of the fans. Speaking of them, that is my next point, let them be happy with current crop of raggedy washed up bunch. We have enough gullible fools who believe we are still improving as a team with what we have. No rush, let the decline be slow, the fans are happy enough to follow their favorite stars on Instagram. They will remain in the national side, they will get call ups in many glorious t20 leagues such as PSL, and they will post pics on Snapchat to keep the fans happy. It doesn’t matter if we win or lose. We don’t care about performances, all we care about is building the brand of Bd cricket, the mediocre politically infested team, which will get slowly phased out. If need be, we will make our money in tier 2 of ICC. Everything is going to plan. Let us take this moment to reflect on our success. Our two plants inside the team, Mushfiqur and Mahmadullah have maintained the charade very well. Sabotaging all wining mentality and rendering the locker room a cheap joke. Mushfiqur and his lackey have succeeded with their corniest of corny might. Our propaganda of pushing SBCS as a decent stadium has also worked! It really is amazing how fans will believe anything. Infrastructure is poor, which we will again profit from by rebuilding. We shall shortchange them on the next coach as well. As you all know, we are currently grooming our future plants who will sabotage the team for years to come. Things have worked out so well, we keep the team down by backing charlatan agents within, and those charlatans go on to have their own fans.

My friends, let us now rejoice in the fall of Bd cricket. Salut.


*Satire.But so was 1984.